What so funny?

Stewie Griffin is a little diapered baby of the Family Guy, who is quite the show stealer. Nobody can shock you out of your skin as much as Stewie. Family Guy quotes are resplendent with cutting retorts from Stewie. Read on.

Stewie: Family Guy Quotes
[watching cheerleaders change in a locker room]
Stewie: It appears my wee-wee's been stricken with rigor mortis.

Stewie: Family Guy Quotes
Stewie: Mother, as first lady of the American stage Helen Hayes once said, "I'm going to kill you."

Stewie: Family Guy Quotes
Stewie: I love God. He's so deliciously evil.

Stewie: Family Guy Quotes
Guy in Chicken Suit: Enjoy your chicken sandwich.
Stewie: Enjoy your studio apartment.

Stewie: Family Guy Quotes
[Lois is washing Stewie's hair in the sink]
Stewie: Careful. It's 'gently rub the scalp', not 'scrub like you're trying to get the vomit out of a Christmas dress', you stupid holiday drunk.

Stewie: Family Guy Quotes
Meg: Can I be in the play, Mom?
Stewie: Oh yes, you can be the dumpy teenage girl who cries backstage because no one finds her attractive.

Stewie: Family Guy Quotes
[While trying to potty-train Stewie]
Peter: Maybe you don't have to pee. I'll just give you some beer, it'll run right through you.

Stewie: Family Guy Quotes
Stewie: Beautiful. And while we're at it we can light up a dubey and watch porn.
Peter: Rea... Really?

clock's ticking!

Another three more months and the year 2009 will have come to an end. Been rather depressing time for me. Won't go too much into these sordid details because only my closet friends would know what I am talking about. So, I guess my New Year's resolution would be just to work to save more, think positively and endeavor to control my destiny (however mundane or small!) into something bigger! 

Till then! 

the story so far

Well, has been some kind of month for me. Changed jobs as the idiot I worked for was the epitome of dictionary-book definition of IDIOT. Thankfully, I left before my sanity and dignity got shat out like everything else he did. Managed to find another job and also took a short vacation, one that I am doing again as I've managed to meet a wonderful person while on my trip. I know perhaps nothing much won't come off the meet but it was nice nonetheless to meet someone as wonderful as him. :-d

Don't get me wrong, I do love my beau. Just that, I feel I am all about big love and that perhaps, my love is not just enough for one person! :-d Am I wrong to feel that way?

Anyways, would be 2009 before I plan another visit to see him and his beautiful country or perhaps he could visit me!

Till then,

That's it so far!

re: SODOMY is the word

In view of the recent ho-hah of the sodomy scandal with Anwar and his new boy-toy (oops, office assistant!), here's a poem about the whole issue and of Mr. Turkey-Neck (aka Najib's) involvement in the oh-so-famous murder trial! Really, the butler really did it!

Title: Sex and the C4

Sodomy is a useful word
recently said and heard,
in Malaysian homes and offices
it's all about famous orifices.
What is going on, you wonder
when Bala steals the thunder,
finger pointing the magic word
to the delight of a horny herd
Organs united, names forgotten?
VIPs are really rotten
Saiful he knows and did not know
doubts about Aminah begin to grow
of whose loose lips he was afraid
but liked her other end instead;
of course he knew it wasn't right
but it felt so good and tight!
You could not hump like Greeks
the Hindenburg's fat cheeks;
what her hubby found so succulent
was making Rosmah trucculent.
And so she thought, the time was due
for a nice Mongolian barbecue.
Enter the analyst, not so anal,
who found the girl too banal;
fearing supernatural harm
from her juicy feminine charm,
he hired Bala straightaway
to keep the honeytrap at bay
but private dicks were of no match
for Aminah's superlative snatch
and now that Najib had had his fill,
he would not share the till;
right after the submarine deal,
Aminah's fate he would seal.
Now Rosmah had one idea
on how to kenakan dia
"Let's bomb the bombshell,
let's send her to hell."
Thus perished the hapless beauty
after translation and booty duty;
now Rosmah's ass was happy
until one blogger got yappy;
this Hindenburg nearly caught fire
yet to sue she has no desire.
But Najib's part in this murder
will travel much further;
despite his media actions
and one or two retractions,
some questions will remain
a big part of his bane–
how did Altantuya really die?
and why did he have to lie?
Did he pay off Bala savvily,
or threaten to C4 his family?
What acts could be more despised?
With his money, we're not surprised;
after all, he's such a bully beast,
to him and him alone, at least,
magic words that cannot apply–
are useful for making rivals die.

re: Insults you should know when travelling overseas

For the budding traveler, visiting another country is often wrecked with anticipation of visiting beautiful locales and destinations often only seen in movies, read about in books and drooled over in magazines. Of course, it helps if you pick up some basic knowledge in the country's native language that you will traveling to. This in turn, will help you in getting through the day sans any embarrassing situations. With that said, one should always learn some swear words, just so you can hit the locals where it hurts!

As they say, "when in Rome, do as the Romans do!". Here are some lovely and devastating insults that you can learn to insult the locals in their native language:

Danish:
Suck devilcock in hell you faggotdwarf (Sut djavlepik i helvede din bossedvarg).

Vietnamese:
"You eat pubic hair with salt-dip" (May an long dai cham mui)

Finnish:
"Piss into a transformer" (Kuse muuntajaan)

Afrikaans:
"Suck on my hemorrhoids and wait for better days" (Siug aan my aambeie en wag vir beter dae")

Albanian:
"May you get fucked by a blind bear" (Te qifte arusha qorre)

Bosnian:
"I dream about farting on you" (Sanjam da prdnem na tebe)

Romanian phrases:

"Shampoo my dick-hair with your saliva" (Shampona-mi-ai flocii cu saliva)

"Brush your teeth, my dick will be inspecting soon!" (Spala-te pe dinti ca vin cu pula in inspectie)

Serbian phrases:

"The Pope fucks you" (Jebo te Papa)

"May your house be live on CNN" (Da bog da ti kuca bila na CNN-U)--this essentially means I hope NATO will bomb your house

Armenian phrases:

"Eshoon noor oodel chi vayeler" It's not pretty watching a jackass try to eat a pomegranate (read: clumsy).

"Krisnera zhazh tan vred" Let the rats ejaculate on you.

"Kak oudelic shoon" Shit eating dog.

"Eshu Koorak" Son of Donkey.

Icelandic phrases:

"Plunger" (Drullusukkor). That is, the plumbing tool, roughly equivalent to "fucktard."

"Girl who drives a truck" (Trukkalessa). A butch lesbian--that one sort of works in America too, no?

When they eventually run out of random items to call one another, they will revert to grittier tactics. A grand majority of them revolve around who or what their antagonist is prone to fucking.

"Corpsefucker" (naridill)

"Sheepfucker" (rollurioari)

"Unclefucker" (frandseroir)

We're thinking that should cover about every situation. Enjoy your trip!

re: For those who is looking to the Golden Years or not

For those looking forward to their Golden Years, do take heed of this sound advice. I would!

*Read the pic next to this blog! Cheers!

How Times Flies!

Seems only yesterday that I was pondering if I actually would live to a hundred, visit the world in 80-days, finally being able to afford living and yes, actually having a job that lasts more than 4 months! (With a decent pay-check to boot!).

Just celebrated my 33rd birthday, very low-key..went out to Chili's with Gary and Brian, had a magharita, chatted for a bit and then, went to play Frozen Throne. (gawds!) sad, sad... then again, even if I want to celebrate in "style" or a grander fashion, that would cost money! Sigh...next year then!

So, got some ang pows from my family ( yay! pocket money for two weeks or more!) and then, that was it. Don't really want a cake or much presents...even my beau forgot to wish me and never did get me anything ( Yes, he is sooo romantic, he is!).

Anyways, time to get on with life or what remains of it...

Later

Vince